Rated TV-14 (DLSV)

Simon: Hi, folks! Simon Seville here. Remember to turn on some lights in the room and sit as far from the monitor as you can.



Narrator: In New York City's fight against crime, the dedicated detectives who pursue the most vicious criminals are members of an elite unit known as ACME Crime Net.

[Lower Manhattan, Tuesday, December 3rd, 7:44am]

[A giant-sized Demonoid attacks the city and laughs maniacally, until the Sephira Racer (Battle Formation) bursts in]

[Cut to the cockpit with Spirit Soldier Silver]

Mana: A Demonoid fight this early in the morning? Whatever. Let's make this quick, 'cause it's my turn to cook breakfast for Big Brother.

[Outside, the Sephira Racer and the Demonoid fight, trading blows with one another over the next minute; afterwards, the Demonoid unleashes a burst of lightning projectiles upon the Sephira Racer, who repels them with its sword]

Mana: Your feeble projectiles don't stand a chance against the Sephira Racer. Sephira Kick!

[The Sephira Racer jumps up and side-kicks the Demonoid, knocking it to the ground]

Mana: Racer Missile, fire!

[The Sephira Racer fires its chest missile at the Demonoid, hitting it]

Mana: Tornado Strike! FINAL ATTACK!

[The Sephira Racer spins around like a tornado and strikes the Demonoid hard with its saber; the Demonoid engulfs in an explosion]

Mana: Another one down and out. Well, time for breakfast.

[The Sephira Racer transports out]

[Back on the ground, Riff and Raw (the thieves from seven episodes prior) arrive to the scene on their bikes]

Raw: Damn, Riff. Did you just see that?

Riff: So the Spirit Soldiers were real all along. It's too bad there's nothing left of that Demonoid to salvage so we could sell the parts to a junkyard. But what's that matter? That's not our top priority.

Raw: Oh, no. We came here for the Deep Red. Once we get that thing, we're as good as rich.

Riff: We just gotta find it and the guy who's holding it, wherever he is.

[Just then, Noah, in a cloak, approaches them]

Noah: Deep Red, you say?

Riff: Yeah, the Deep Red. What's it to you, man?

Noah: Perhaps I could be of some assistance. The man you seek who possesses it-- I know where he is.

Riff: Where?

Noah: Now, now. This information comes at a price.

Raw: [looks inside his wallet] I only have $35.

Riff: [looks inside his wallet] 65.

Noah: Hmph. I'll tell you what. Those bicycles look valuable. Each more than three times what you boys have combined. Perhaps you two could trade them in for the information? In addition, you bring me that pendant, and whatever I make from it, I give you half.

Riff: Whatever it takes. Raw, give him your bike.

[He hands Noah his bike; Raw does the same for his]

Raw: You better not be messin' with us. Took us a week to get here by bike.

Noah: All right, then. [writes down the address in his notepad and hands it to Riff] Here's the address. You'll find the pendant and its owner there. Well, I'd best be off. [sets off on one of the bikes with the other in tow]

Raw: Well, guess we'll be spending the rest of the journey on foot.

Riff: Not that it'll be very long. And you never know when or where we might find loose change in this city. Let's go.

[They set off on foot]

[132 Madison Street, 8:11am]

[Mana serves breakfast to her group]

Mana: Hope everyone's hungry. [sits down to eat]

Tohka: Oh, am I ever!

All of Shido's group: Thank you for the food!

[Tohka is the first to start eating, fast]

Tohka: Mana, your cooking really amazes me!

Origami: I agree. The tamagoyaki gives the bread on the side a lovely flavor.

Shido: I sure taught you well, Mana. Getting better every day.

Mana: [blushes] Oh, Big Brother.

Shido: By the way, I saw that battle from the lab. You sure are getting the hang of things with the Sephira Racer.

Mana: Gee, thanks, Brother.

Tohka: No question about it. Two weeks as a Spirit Soldier, and you never cease to impress.

[About half an hour later, everyone is finished]

Miku: So, have you guys heard about ACME's upcoming fundraising dinner show?

Kotori: Yep. That's Friday night. $100 per admission. Tor and Alvin are co-chairmen of the committee.

Alvin: [enters with Simon and Theodore] That's right, guys. It was a tough vote, but we at the committee meeting decided that Tor and I should both be in charge. I accepted on the condition that Simon be vice-chairman in charge of talent scouting, and Theodore in charge of refreshments.

Simon: [looks through his clipboard] Here's the lineup we have so far. We still need a warmup act, but right after, we have Sophie singing, the Chipettes have act 3, Miyabi and Tomoe are singing a duet in act 4, followed by Rockapella, act 6 has Rito's comedy, Julie and Imari are on flaming batons in act 7, acts 8 and 9 are still pending, and Tor and Lilith wrap up the first half with a duet. Afterwards, we take a 10-minute intermission, and then it's magician time.

Tohka: Can you squeeze us in? Shido and Mana can do one act, and us Spirits can do another.

Simon: I'm sure we can do that, Tohka. But what can you do?

Mana: Big Brother and Mana can do a dance number.

Tohka: And the rest of us can sing.

Simon: Really? You know any songs?

Tohka: For this audition, I've got just... the... One. Ladies?

[Her fellow Spirits stand up and stand in line; they put on yellow top hats and sing and dance to a song from A Chorus Line]

Spirits: One...
Tohka: ...singular sensation.
Every little step she takes.
Spirits: One...
Tohka: ...thrilling combination.
Every move that she makes.
Miku: One smile, and suddenly nobody else will do.
Kotori: You know you'll never be lonely with you-know-who.
Spirits: One...
Tohka: ...moment in her presence,
and you can't forget the rest.
Miku: For the girl is second best
to none,
son.
Kotori: Ooh! Sigh!
Give her your attention.
Do I
really have to mention?
All three: She's the one!

Kurumi: She walks into a room,
and you know she's uncommonly rare,
very unique,
peripatetic, poetic and chic.
Yoshino: She walks into a room, and you know from her
maddening poise, effortless whirl.
Yoshinon: She's a special girl.
Nia: Strolling.
Can't help all of her qualities
extolling.
Kaguya and Yuzuru: Loaded with charisma is my
jauntily sauntering, ambling shambler.
Origami: She walks into a room and you know you must
shuffle along, join the parade.
She's the quintessence of making the grade.
Mukuro: This is whatcha' call traveling.
Oh, strut your stuff!
Can't get enough
of her
Love her.
Natsumi: I'm a son of a gun, she is one of a kind.

[The following two verses are sung in unison]

Tohka, Miku, and Kotori: One...
Tohka: ...singular sensation.
Every little step she takes.
Tohka, Miku, and Kotori: One...
Tohka: ...thrilling combination.
Every move that she makes.
Miku: One smile, and suddenly nobody else will do.
Kotori: You know you'll never be lonely with you-know-who.
All three: One...
Tohka: ...moment in her presence,
and you can't forget the rest.
Miku: For the girl is second best
to none,
son.
Kotori: Ooh! Sigh!
Give her your attention.
Do I
really have to mention?
All three: She's the one!

Kurumi: She walks into a room,
and you know she's uncommonly rare,
very unique,
peripatetic, poetic and chic.
Yoshino: She walks into a room, and you know from her
maddening poise, effortless whirl.
Yoshinon: She's a special girl.
Nia: Strolling.
Can't help all of her qualities
extolling.
Kaguya and Yuzuru: Loaded with charisma is my
jauntily sauntering, ambling shambler.
Origami: She walks into a room and you know you must
shuffle along, join the parade.
She's the quintessence of making the grade.
Mukuro: This is whatcha' call traveling.
Oh, strut your stuff!
Can't get enough
of her
Love her.
Natsumi: I'm a son of a gun, she is one of a kind.

[They kickline together, then sing the last verse together]

All 11: One...
...singular sensation.
Every little step she takes.
One...
...thrilling combination.
Every move that she makes.
One smile, and suddenly nobody else will do.
You know you'll never be lonely with you-know-who.
One...
moment in her presence,
and you can't forget the rest.
For the girl is second best
to none,
son.
Ooh! Sigh!
Give her your attention.
Do I
really have to mention?
She's the...
She's the...
She's the...
ONE!!

[Everyone else applauds]

Simon: No question about it. You're in! But you need a group name. One that doesn't reveal your status as Spirits or Spirit Soldiers.

Origami: How about the Hendecades?

Alvin: Hendecades?

Origami: A play on cadence and hendecagon, an 11-sided shape. And since this is a group of 11 girls,...

Simon: Okie-dokie. [writes it down on the list of acts] The Hendecades.

Tohka: Hmm. I like the name. But we need to come up with a different song. One that'll be worth the $100 admission.

Kotori: One was just for the audition. I don't think they'll wanna hear a song in a one-night-only show when there's plenty of performances of A Chorus Line still active around the world.

Alvin: Well, before you talk that over, how about Shido and Mana's dance?

Shido: Shall we?

Mana: Much obliged.

[They get out of their seats and dance to Dela by Johnny Clegg over the next few minutes]

[Afterwards, the two pose and bow; the others applaud]

Alvin: I know this isn't a dance contest, but...

All three Chipmunks: [each hold up a 10 card] 10!

Simon: [writes it down on the list] You guys are in! Our show's close to complete!

Mana: [jumps up] YAY! [hugs Shido tightly] We did it, Big Brother!

Shido: Mana, easy! You're crushing me!

Mana: Oops! [lets go] Sorry! I get so carried away when I get excited.

Alvin: Just remember, you all have three days to practice and pick out whatever outfits you need. The show starts at 6:00 Friday night at the Marriott Marquis, but we expect our acts to meet us backstage at least half an hour before their act.

Nia: That doesn't give us much time, everyone! We gotta get busy!

[The whole group rushes to their guest room]

Simon: Okay, fellas. All that's left is an opening act before we introduce the host.

Alvin: [sighs] Since Rockapella and the Chipettes are already booked for the show, I guess it's up to us. Any ideas for the song, Si?

Simon: You know, we haven't done The Alvin Twist lately, and not at all in our previous shows these past few years.

Theodore: What a wonderful idea!

Alvin: I couldn't have thought of a better warm-up act myself!

[His smartphone rings; caller ID: Lemke]

Alvin: Excuse me. [picks up] Hey, Lemke.

Lemke: Hello, Alvin. Bad news. Our host has tonsillitis and won't be hosting.

Alvin: I'm sorry. We must have poor reception. [taps the back of his phone] I could've sworn you said the host we had for Friday night was sick with tonsillitis and wasn't going to make it.

Lemke: That’s exactly what I said.

Alvin: Oh, right. Okay. I’ll let ‘em know and find another one. Thanks. Bye.

Lemke: Bye.

[Alvin hangs up as Sophie walks up to them]

Sophie: Hey, boys. Need any help?

Alvin: As a matter of fact, Sophie, we do. Lemke just called. We gotta find another host, because the one we hired is sick with tonsillitis. He’s gonna have surgery tomorrow, but he won’t be 100% by Friday.

Theodore: Who are we gonna find to take his place?

Sophie: I happen to know someone who's in need of a little show biz.

Alvin: You wouldn't happen to be talking about Arlene Highbury, would you?

Theodore: That's a great idea! But who is Arlene Highbury?

Sophie: Who is Arlene Highbury? Theodore, she's one of the Six Heads. She represents the United States as part of the Order of the White Knights. She’s one of my supervisors.

Simon: Sophie, you’re a genius!

Alvin: [hands Simon a contract] Here, bro. Make her sign this contract.

Simon: Roger that.

Sophie: [hands Simon an index card] Here’s her address.

Simon: Thanks. I’m gonna get one of the Exceeds to drive me there, and we’re gonna meet this woman face-to-face!

[He heads out]

[116 MacDougal Street, Greenwich Village, 11:44am]

[The Exceeds’ SUV stops in front of an apartment building with a hardware store on the bottom left; Tomoe and Simon come out of the car and look up]

Tomoe: Are you sure this is the right address Sophie gave you?

Simon: [hands Tomoe the address] Says so right there.

Tomoe: [looks at the address] 116. But did she say anything about a hardware store?

Simon: Sophie says Arlene inherited it after her dad passed away, and she lives upstairs, but she hardly ever comes down unless no one's working the register. C’mon.

[He and Tomoe enter the building and head up the stairs to the third floor; on one of the doors is a sign: “A. Highbury; enter with caution”]

Tomoe: Highbury.

[She knocks on the door]

Arlene: [behind door] It’s open.

[Tomoe opens the door; she and Simon enter and close the door; Arlene is nowhere in sight]

Simon: Arlene Highbury?

Tomoe: Anybody home?

[They look around]

Simon: I heard a voice, but I don’t see anybody.

Tomoe: You said she hardly comes downstairs, right?

Simon: Basically, she’s a shut-in.

Tomoe: [looks around and notices technology all over the place] Well, for a shut-in, she’s quite a techno geek.

[Simon notices a set of unusual binoculars; he picks them up from the shelf]

Simon: Neat binoculars.

Tomoe: Uh, Simon, I wouldn’t…

[Simon pushes a button on the binoculars, causing them to extend]

Tomoe: Whoa!

Simon: Incredible! Sophie didn’t tell me Arlene was into gadgets!

[He points the binoculars out the window]

Simon: I feel like the guy in Rear Window, except I’m looking six feet away.

Tomoe: You’re making me nervous.

Simon: Come on, Tomoe. I’m a geek. She’s a geek. [retracts the binoculars and puts them down] Nothing wrong with checking this stuff out for myself.

[He picks up a Game Boy from the coffee table]

Simon: And check out this old Game Boy.

Tomoe: No way she could’ve made her own Game Boy.

[Simon turns on the Game Boy; unlike an ordinary one, this one has a backlit screen]

Simon: Didn’t have to. It’s modded with a backlight!

[He plays Tetris on the Game Boy]

Tomoe: Yes, that’s cool and all, but if Arlene catches us playing around with her gadgets, she’s not gonna sign the contract.

Simon: Oh, you’re no fun.

Tomoe: Since when did you start acting like Alvin?

Simon: [shuts off the Game Boy and puts it back on the table] Well, at least he’s no techno geek like me and Arlene. Look, from what Sophie told me, she's not only into mechanics, but she's also a professional armorer.

[All of a sudden, a metal pyramid on wheels approaches them from the nearby bedroom]

Simon: Uh, Tomoe, you think we’re actually being watched?

Tomoe: I did warn you about touching Arlene’s stuff.

[The pyramid stops; the doors in front open, and out comes Arlene Highbury herself]


Arlene: Sorry about the delay, you two. I’m Arlene Highbury.

Tomoe: That’s her?

Simon: Exactly as Sophie described.

Tomoe: Sorry about my friend here. He’s been itching to see how you come up with these inventions. Anyway, I’m Tomoe Tachibana, and this is...

Arlene: Simon Seville.

Simon: I take it you’ve heard of me and my brothers.

Arlene: Mm-hmm. Plus, you’re the kid Sophie called me about. She said your brother needs someone to emcee your fundraiser to help the foster kids. I’d be very happy to be your hostess.

Simon: That’s great! [hands Arlene the contract] Here’s the contract.

[Arlene signs her signature on the contract, then hands it back to Simon, who hands her a card with the address to the warehouse, the address to the Marriott Marquis, and the Chipmunks’ numbers and email addresses]

Simon: Thanks a bunch, Arlene. I just hope you don’t come down with sickness like the last host did.

Arlene: I promise you, Simon, I’ll be there. Just gotta find a good dress.

Tomoe: I’m sure if you drop by our warehouse sometime during the week, we’ll get you one.

Arlene: Oh, thanks, Tomoe. Now, you guys run along. I’ve got some soldering to do.

[Simon and Tomoe leave, giving her thumbs-up signals]

Arlene: Nice kid.

[Unbeknownst to anyone, outside the building, a Demonoid drone notices Simon and Tomoe getting back in the SUV; the drone vanishes]

[Neo-DEM HQ, 12:00pm]

[An image of Arlene is shown on the monitor of Westcott's office]

Nervadrone: Her name is Arlene Highbury, Apparently, she's an armorer and mechanic.

Westcott: We could use someone like her for our ever-diminishing team.

Nervadrone: There's one problem, though, sir. She's a recluse. But I know a way to lure her out. [snaps her fingers]

[A woman (played by Meaghan Martin) in a CR Unit enters]

Nervadrone: Since JB was killed by that traitor, it's been rather difficult to find new Wizards. Thankfully, I hired one just last week. I had her flown out of Los Angeles. Her name is Jolene-Marie Bergen.

Jolene-Marie: I only got the job because I want Brittany Miller's head. She got me locked up for seven years for possessing stuff my father stole from our local mall in LA.

Westcott: Really? Hmm,... All right, then.

Nervadrone: Okay, Bergen. Here's the plan.

[Apartment of Arlene Highbury, 12:56pm]

[Arlene looks in her closet for a dress]

Last edited by TVLubber (4/01/2025 6:25 pm)